Register    Login    Forum    Search    FAQ

Portal » Board index » PUBLIC FORUMS » Freelancers Lounge




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 418 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1 ... 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 ... 28  Next
Author Message
 Post subject:
 Post Posted: Tue Nov 24, 2009 7:49 pm 
Offline
Member
Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Oct 12, 2009 7:43 am
Posts: 332
Location: Netherlands
lol!


Top 
 Profile E-mail  
 
 Post subject:
 Post Posted: Tue Nov 24, 2009 10:16 pm 
Offline
Site Admin
Site Admin
User avatar

Joined: Sat Jan 05, 2008 7:47 am
Posts: 6689
Location: Virginia
Scam

Clever Scam - taking advantage of older men.


Women often receive warnings about protecting themselves at the mall and in dark parking lots, etc.

This is the first warning I have seen for men. I wanted to pass it on in case you haven't heard about it.

This is much more commonplace during warmer weather.

A 'heads up' for those men who may be regular Lowe's, Home Depot, or Sam's customers. This one caught me by surprise.

Over the last few weeks I have become a victim of a clever scam while out shopping.

Simply going out to get supplies has turned out to be quite traumatic. Don't be naive enough to think it couldn't happen to you or your friends.

Here's how the scam works:

Two seriously good-looking 20-something girls come over to your car as you are packing your shopping into the trunk. They both start wiping your windshield with a rag and Windex, with their breasts almost falling out of their skimpy T-shirts. It is impossible not to look. When you thank them and offer them a tip, they say 'No' and instead ask you for a ride to McDonalds.

You agree and they get into the back seat. On the way, they start undressing. Then one of them climbs over into the front seat and starts crawling all over you, while the other one steals your wallet. I had my wallet stolen Oct. 4th, 9th, 12th, 17th, twice on the 20th, 24th, & 30th. Also, Nov. 3rd & 6th, and again twice on the 10th and 14th and very likely again this upcoming week.

So tell your friends to be careful. What a horrible way to take advantage of older men.

Warn your friends to be vigilant.

Target has wallets on sale for $2.99 each. I found cheaper ones for $1.99 at Wal-Mart and bought all they had. Also, you will never get to eat at McDonalds and I've already spent $90 on gas just running back and forth to Lowe's, Home Depot, and Sam's.


Top 
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
 Post Posted: Tue Nov 24, 2009 10:43 pm 
 
20~ [email protected] of the above! 16~


Top 
  
 
 Post subject:
 Post Posted: Wed Nov 25, 2009 12:02 am 
Offline
Member
Member
User avatar

Joined: Wed May 27, 2009 10:59 am
Posts: 216
Location: Aberdeen South Dakota
NICE


Top 
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
 Post Posted: Wed Nov 25, 2009 11:12 am 
Offline
Member
Member
User avatar

Joined: Thu Oct 29, 2009 10:35 am
Posts: 69
16~ 19~ 16~ 21~

_________________
Image
<<<<<<<<<<<<<Oh yes, it's gonna BuRn!>>>>>>>>>>>>>


Top 
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
 Post Posted: Wed Nov 25, 2009 3:33 pm 
Offline
Member
Member
User avatar

Joined: Fri Jun 19, 2009 11:59 am
Posts: 946
Location: UK
And there's me thinking you weren't that gullible DwnUndr! Quality 16~



Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates.

'In honour of this holy season' Saint Peter said, 'You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven.'

The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. 'It represents a candle', he said.
'You may pass through the pearly gates' Saint Peter said.

The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, 'They're bells.'
Saint Peter said 'You may pass through the pearly gates'.

The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's knickers.

St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, 'And just what do those symbolize?'
The man replied, 'These are Carols.'

and so the Christmas season begins......

_________________
Image


Top 
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
 Post Posted: Wed Nov 25, 2009 9:31 pm 
Offline
Member
Member
User avatar

Joined: Thu Apr 24, 2008 5:36 pm
Posts: 488
Location: Florida
20~

_________________
Image
http://profile.xfire.com/biloxiblue


Top 
 Profile E-mail  
 
 Post subject:
 Post Posted: Wed Nov 25, 2009 9:54 pm 
 
21~ 20~


Top 
  
 
 Post subject:
 Post Posted: Thu Nov 26, 2009 11:38 am 
Offline
Member
Member
User avatar

Joined: Thu May 21, 2009 2:50 pm
Posts: 329
Happy Birthday all you turkeys! 16~ Gobble Gobble


Top 
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
 Post Posted: Fri Nov 27, 2009 6:24 pm 
Offline
Member
Member
User avatar

Joined: Fri Jun 19, 2009 11:59 am
Posts: 946
Location: UK
I think AlphaDoG might possibly appreciate this one... 24~


A burglar broke into a house one night.
He shone his flashlight around as he went, looking for valuables when a voice in the dark said, 'Jesus knows you're here.'

He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more after a bit, he shook his head and continued.
Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard 'Jesus is watching you.' Freaked out, he shone his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot.

'Did you say that?' he hissed at the parrot. 'Yep', the parrot confessed, then squawked, 'I'm just trying to warn you that he is watching you.'
The burglar relaxed. 'Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?'
'Moses,' replied the bird.
'Moses?' the burglar laughed. 'What kind of people would name a bird Moses?'

'The kind of people that would name a Rottweiler Jesus.'


Top 
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
 Post Posted: Fri Nov 27, 2009 9:30 pm 
 
Classic! LOL
Good one 'Keeper 20~


Top 
  
 
 Post subject:
 Post Posted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 8:56 pm 
Offline
Member
Member
User avatar

Joined: Sat Jan 05, 2008 1:16 pm
Posts: 1309
Location: Salem Illinois
[AR]Peacekeeper wrote:
I think AlphaDoG might possibly appreciate this one... 24~




Yep appreciate I did. Very nice.

As I am Ursa Canine, I thought I'd share this tale concerning my cousin Ursa Major.

A Russian scientist and a Czechoslovakian scientist had spent their whole lives studying the majestic grizzly bear. Each year they petitioned their respective governments to allow them to go to Yellowstone to study these wondrous beasts.

Finally, their request was granted and they immediately flew to New York and then on west to Yellowstone. They reported to the local ranger station and were told that it was the grizzly mating season and it was much too dangerous to go out and study the animals.

They pleaded that this was their only chance. Finally the ranger relented. The Russian and the Czech were given cell phones and told to report in each and every day.

For several days they called in, and then nothing was heard from the two scientists. The rangers mounted a search party and found the scientists' camp completely ravaged. No sign of the missing men.

They then followed the trail of a male and a female bear. They found the female and decided they must kill the animal to find out if she had eaten the scientists because they feared an international incident.

They killed the female and cut open the bear's stomach… only to find the remains of the Russian.

One ranger turned to the other and said, "You know what this means, don't you?"

"Of course," the other ranger nodded. "The Czech is in the male."

_________________
Image


Top 
 Profile E-mail  
 
 Post subject:
 Post Posted: Mon Nov 30, 2009 1:09 pm 
Offline
Member
Member
User avatar

Joined: Thu Jul 24, 2008 6:23 am
Posts: 4181
Location: Nunya
STUTTERING CAT

A teacher is explaining biology to her 4th grade students. 'Human beings are the only animals that stutter,' she says.

A little girl raises her hand. 'I had a kitty-cat who stuttered.'

The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become, asked the girl to describe the incident.

'Well,' she began, 'I was in the back yard with my kitty and the Rottweiler that lives next door got a running start and before we knew it, he jumped over the fence into our yard!'

'That must have been scary,' said the teacher.

'It sure was,' said the little girl. 'My kitty raised her back, went Sssss, Sssss, Sssss' and before she could say 'Shit,' the Rottweiler ate her!'

The teacher had to leave the room.

_________________
Image
Image
Mission accomplished.
Freelancer, 16 Years & Still Playing


Top 
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
 Post Posted: Sat Dec 12, 2009 1:05 pm 
Offline
Member
Member
User avatar

Joined: Fri Jun 19, 2009 11:59 am
Posts: 946
Location: UK
Nice one HunterKiller!


Not intentional but AlphaDoG, you might just get this one:



3 dogs, a Doberman, a Boxer and a Labrador are sitting in a vets office and strike up a conversation.

The Doberman turns to the Boxer and asks, "what are you here for?"

"I'm a pisser" said the Boxer, "I piss on everything, the sofa, the cat, the kid but the final straw was last night when I pissed in the middle of my owners bed."

"So, what is the vet gonna do?" the Doberman asks.
"Lethal injection" came the sad reply from the Boxer.

The Doberman turns to the Labrador and asked the same question.

"I'm a digger" said the Labrador, "I dig under fences, I dig up flowers and trees. I dig for the hell of it. When inside I even dig up the carpets, but I went over the limit when I dug a hole in the middle of the owner's couch."

"So, what they gonna go to you?" asks the Doberman.
"Lethal injection," replied the Dejected Labrador.

The Labrador then asked the Doberman why he was there.

"I'm a humper. I'll hump anything, I'll hump the cat, pillows, the table, fire hydrants. Whatever. I want to hump everything I see. Yesterday, my owner had just gotten out of the shower and bent down to dry her toes and I couldn't help myself and hopped on her back and started humping away."

The Boxer and Labrador exchanged a sad glance and said, "So, lethal injection for you too, huh?"

"No, No", the Doberman said. "I'm here to get my nails clipped."


Top 
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
 Post Posted: Tue Dec 15, 2009 9:15 am 
Offline
Member
Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Nov 03, 2008 8:59 pm
Posts: 1024
Do you know the difference between Santa Clause & Tiger Woods?

Santa usually stops after 3 hoes...













....Ho hO Ho & uv7

_________________
Image



http://kevan.org/brain.cgi?Anthrax_Zombie
http://zombiefreelancer.forumotion.net/forum.htm
"......To WiN, yOu MuSt LeArN hOw tO DiE......" uv46


Top 
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
 
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 418 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1 ... 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 ... 28  Next

Portal » Board index » PUBLIC FORUMS » Freelancers Lounge


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 5 guests

 
 

 
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
cron